The video below shows 4 mistakes we’ve probably all done at one time or another. I saw myself with my kids in a couple of the examples but I’m able to laugh about it because I didn’t leave things as they were. Kids are so resilient when you come back to help them in a different fashion.
At the end of the video you’ll see a demonstration of how to help kids deal with fear in a healthy manner.
Please note in the video, an adult plays the role of a child running home frightened.
Why is it dangerous for our kids to deal with fear in wrong ways?
- If they grow up dismissing fear, they will be unaware when real danger is around.
- If they grow up being punished for being fearful, they will feel devalued and may even become one who enjoys inflicting fear or pain upon others.
- If they grow up being “saved” over every little thing, they will become extremely co-dependent always looking to others to save them from their own fear and/or blaming others for their problems.
- If they grow up having their fear ignored, they will most likely disregard dangers and simply become prey to predators, because, after all – they don’t exist.
When a child is coached by you, their loving parent, they feel validated and valued. Coaching also helps the child gauge your level of concern by your self-controlled actions concerning the incident. Your calm approach gives the child confidence that they, too, will be able to handle even those fearful situations in life in a competent manner.
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